Sabhartrukabhirnaribhiha Sevyaha Svapatirishavat |
Andho Rogi Daridro Va Shardho Vachyam Na Durvachaha ||159||
Lord Swaminarayan over four Shlokas gives the additional duties applying to married women. A Sabhartrukabhirnari is a woman who lives with her Swami (husband); such a Suvasini (whose husband is alive) should serve (Seva) their husbands (Svapati) in the manner they serve God, even if they are blind (Andha), ailing (Rogi), poor (Daridra) or impotent (Shardho).
Sabhartrusevanameva Tasaam Mukhyo Dharmaha - their foremost duty is to serve their husband explains Shatanand. Narad in Shrimad Bhagwat explains, ‘Those women like Goddess Laxmi, who serve their husband with the affection that they are serving God enjoy great bliss with their husbands in Vaikuntha Dhaam.’ Lord Shri Krishna in Bhagwat has also said, ‘O Gopis! To serve one’s husband without treachery is your highest duty (Param Dharma). To serve your husband’s family and to raise progeny is your best duty (Shreshta Dharma). O Gopis! Even if your husband is of unfavourable qualities, of undesirable fate, old, foolish, ailing or poor, you should never leave your husbands for any reason other than if he commits a great sin such as murder (in which case he should be served from afar).’ Kashyapa has said, ‘A wife’s greatest strength and lustre is her husband.’
Secondly, they should never utter harsh words towards their husband - Vaachyam Na Durvachaha. Yagnavalkya explains, ‘Women should never speak harsh words. The husband should always act favourably and suitably. The wife should obey and respect the wishes of her husband - that is her greatest Dharma. Also if her husband is endowed with sinful qualities, then she should remain with him and wait for her husband to become cleansed of such sin.’
Narad summarises by saying, ‘Wives should serve their husbands in the manner that they serve God. She should be favourable towards his wishes, affectionate towards his family and always acting in accordance with his wishes. She should maintain the house by seeing to household duties such as cleaning, dusting and making the house attractive. She should adorn clothes to make herself look attractive. She should always dress respectfully by wearing clothes and accessories that suitably cover her body.’
Women who do not serve their husbands in this manner are reborn upon this Earth for several lifetimes in poverty stricken households. Shatanand says that even if a woman’s husband is hot tempered, lazy or careless, she should not renounce him. They should pray to Lord Shree Hari for his favour. In this way a Pativrata Nari is famed in this world and others.
The Pati (husband) should be considered as Vishnu and the Patni (wife) as Laxmi. In this way they should look upon each other and treat each other with respect. She should strive to make her husband happy and treat his family like her own. She should raise their children, instilling righteous qualities within them. She should never think to leave her husband in times of difficulty but stay at the side of her husband as Shakti Rupa (strength and support) and work to resolve the situation and remain content in good times as well as bad.